Why Do Cheating Husbands Stay Married

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By Christie David-Simire


Are you curious about why cheating husbands stay married? This article aims to provide you with the answers to that question.

The beginning of this article will discuss the factors that make husbands cheat on their wives. Then, we’ll analyze why cheating husbands stay married.

Following that is how to deal with unfaithful husbands who stay married.

In the end, there will be a FAQ that addresses common questions regarding this topic.

What Makes Married Men Cheat On Their Wives

What Makes Married Men Unfaithful to Their Wives?

Infidelity is morally unacceptable in marriage but still occurs among married couples. Some reasons married men cheat on their partners may be as follows.

1. When Communication Deteriotes

Breakdown in communication with their spouses makes some male partners feel ignored or misunderstood. Consequently, this contributes to their decision to cheat on their wives.

There may be some underlying issues that they could not tell or resolve with their female partners. Moreover, some married men tend to internalize their emotions or seek solace in someone else who they feel will give them a listening ear.

Besides, communication decline may result from various elements, such as compressed schedules, pressure, and lack of intimacy.

According to insider.com, communication is the basis of marriage. Therefore, a lack of adequate communication could lead to cheating.

2. Lack of Sexual Satisfaction

A significant factor for guys’ infidelity to their wives is unsatisfying sex. As established by womenshealthmag.com, sexual satisfaction can help a couple bond more.

Hence, sexual intimacy is an essential aspect of a healthy marriage, and the lack of it can make a man feel frustrated. According to thrivingmarriages.com, males view sex as a bodily and spiritual bond with their wives.

Thus, if a man feels dissatisfied sexually with his wife, he may seek contentment outside. Besides, if they don’t get quality sex more often as they desire, some men feel betrayed, as stated by wikihow.com

3. Self-Exploration/Want of Variety

According to marriage.com, the reason some men engage in extramarital affairs may be rooted in a sense of sexual suppression within the marriage. They may desire to explore and be adventurous sexually.

Over time, the pattern and predictability of married life can lead to a feeling of redundancy. Basically, husbands may long for something different when the spark and excitement of the relationship fade.

Thus, they might want to explore new feelings and have more variety in their relationships and sexual life. Unfortunately, this can lead them to make the wrong choice, such as infidelity.

4. They Crave More Appreciation

Certain males can be unfaithful to their wives if they’re not getting enough appreciation at home, as indicated on medium.com. To appreciate men means to realize and sincerely convey thankfulness for their contribution and worth to the family.

They might want their efforts and feelings to be recognized more. Hence, if they find someone who gives them that appreciation, they might be tempted to be with that person instead.

It’s like looking for something they feel is missing in their current relationship.

5. Immaturity

Some men may cheat because they are naive. They act like youngsters who cannot control their emotions or make responsible choices.

Such males who engage in marital infidelity place more preference on instantaneous urges and gratification instead of the long-term effects. As lifeadvance.com states, they forget how much their mates will be hurt when they impulsively engage in extramarital affairs.

Moreover, wikihow.com says such men assume that all men commit adultery and insist it is in their DNA to cheat.

Why Unfaithful Husbands Don’t Leave Their Marriage

In this section, we’ll explore possible reasons men who commit marital infidelity remain married.

1. They Have Not Stopped Loving their Wives

One may think that guys who involve in extramarital affairs do not have affection for their wives anymore. However, as insinuated by hernorm.com, despite the affair, the cheating husband might still have an emotional attachment and feelings for his spouse.

Moreso, cheating husbands staying in their marriage may result from their value and appreciation for their wives for being good moms. Besides, the thought of losing the strong bond and connection they’ve developed over the years weighs heavily on them.

2. They Wish to Keep The Family Together

Husbands who cheat may not want to leave the marriage because they fear breaking family ties. This is more likely when they have children.

According to oneluckycouple.com, an unfaithful male partner may choose to stay married because he knows that divorce can hurt the kids.

Furthermore, they may not go for legal separation to maintain oneness and stability for the children. Even if the affair may not be a secret, a cheating spouse could stay with his family so that the children can have a better upbringing

3. It Wasn’t Intentional

As implied by herway.net, cheating husbands may stay married because their act was not intentional and may have repented genuinely. An attraction may have occurred with a girl in the office, and they lacked the power to control their emotions.

Furthermore, they may have been involved in mere fun of flirting, or it was a case of drunkenness, as stated by thinkaloud.net

Such spouses know the implication of their mistakes and probably have decided never to betray their wives again. They may feel responsible for their actions and don’t want to disrupt their spouse’s life.

4. Financial Consequences

The financial impact of divorce is another major factor that keeps men who cheat on their wives from leaving them.

Divorce, particularly when caused by infidelity, can have severe financial consequences, as suggested by hernorm.com. Hence, unfaithful husbands may choose to stay married to avoid the risk of losing their assets.

Moreover, charismaticpersona suggests that men financially dependent on their spouse may choose to stay married.

5. Social And Emotional Stress

Social and emotional stress can play a role in influencing a cheating husband to stay married for a variety of reasons. For example, societal norms, family expectations, and cultural values often place a strong emphasis on the institution of marriage.

Therefore, the stress of facing potential criticism might lead the husband to prioritize maintaining the appearance of a stable marriage. He may remain married to avoid feeling isolated and alienated from society.

The label of “divorced men” may also deter them from ending their marriages, as suggested by psychologytoday.com. In fact, completecase.com claims that men suffer more from divorce than women because they lack social support.

How To Deal With A Cheating Husband

How To Deal With Cheating Husbands

Every marriage is different, so there is no all-purpose solution for dealing with infidelity. However, the following tips may help you cope with this complex and emotional issue.

1. Get Your Facts Right

You may have a gut feeling that your husband is cheating on you. However, avoid acting on assumptions – do not rely on what you hear from people.

According to marriage.com, to deal with men who cheat, you need to be well-informed and prepared. Before facing them, ensure you have adequate proof, and they’re from a reliable source.

It can be incredibly painful and frustrating to hear that one’s husband is cheating. Nonetheless, before addressing such a situation, you should have solid proof so they don’t deny it.

2. Avoid Broadcasting it

You may feel the need to expose your husband’s infidelity to the world. However, that’s not the best way to cope with cheating spouses.

Instead, calm down and let the shock subside before you act. You may regret it later if you vent your anger and tell everyone what happened.

Besides, wikihow.com says if you expose your husband’s cheating and then forgive him, people may judge him differently.

3. Open Communication

The best thing to do after you have been able to manage your emotions and gather concrete evidence is to confront him. This will help you to know exactly what happened and what caused it.

However, choose the right place and time to discuss your husband’s cheating, as pointed out by bonobology.com. Don’t begin discussing infidelity during a family event or when he is preparing for an important meeting.

Moreover, prepare for him to deny his actions and blame you. Hence, be straightforward and adhere to the facts you have when you question him.

Ask him about his reasons, extramarital partners, and expectations from the marriage. However, listen calmly to his responses and try to understand his perspective without judgment, as indicated by marriage.com.

4. Counseling Or Therapy

Consider seeking the assistance of a trained therapist or counselor, both individually and as a couple. A professional can help navigate the complex emotions, communication challenges, and issues that contributed to the affair.

Therapy can also provide a safe space to work on rebuilding trust and understanding.

5. Practice Self-care

Practicing self-care is an essential aspect of coping with challenging situations, including dealing with a cheating husband. While self-care may not directly address the issue of infidelity, it can play a significant role in helping you navigate your emotions.

It also allows you to make informed decisions and rebuild your life in the aftermath of such a betrayal.

Discovering infidelity can lead to intense emotions, such as anger, sadness, and confusion. So, engaging in self-care activities, such as mindfulness, meditation, and journaling, can help you process these emotions.

It also helps promote a sense of emotional balance. Besides, self-care encourages self-reflection, allowing you to better understand your feelings, needs, and desires.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. Do Cheating Husbands Still Love Their Wives?

Cheating does not always mean that a man does not love his wife. A lot of factors can lead to infidelity, even in a happy marriage, as indicated by freeandconnected.com

2. Why Do Wives Stay With Unfaithful Husbands?

The decision of why some wives choose to stay with unfaithful husbands is complex. Hence, it can vary significantly from one individual to another.

People’s motivations are influenced by a wide range of factors, including emotional, social, psychological, and practical considerations. However, some common reasons wives stay with unloyal husbands include love, commitment, fear of change, hope of change, and children.

3. What Damage Does Cheating Do To The Brain?

Medium.com suggests that cheating can dull the brain’s sensitivity to honesty, making it easier to cheat again. It can also impair the brain’s ability to process information accurately.

4. Why Do Cheating Husbands Stay Married?

Cheating husbands may choose to stay married for a variety of reasons, despite their infidelity. However, it’s important to recognize that each individual’s motivations are unique and can be influenced by a combination of factors.

Regardless, a reason why cheating husbands might opt to remain in their marriages include financial consideration. Also, if the act wasn’t intentional and he feels remorse, an unfaithful husband might stay married.

5. Does A Relationship End After Cheating?

Choosintherapy.com states that Infidelity does not have to end a relationship. However, that’s as long as both partners are committed to working through their thoughts and feelings and healing together.


The decision of why some cheating husbands choose to remain married is complex and influenced by a mix of emotions. While infidelity can significantly damage trust and emotional bonds, various factors can lead these husbands to stay in their marriages.

Gladly, this article discussed several reasons why unloyal husbands stay married. However, it’s important to remember that staying married after cheating does not necessarily mean the relationship will be restored.

Nonetheless, we explore various ways to deal with an unfaithful husband who chooses to remain in their marriage.

In anticipation that you found this article helpful, we encourage you to share it with your friends and family on social media.

You can also visit our Relationship page for similar articles.

References And Further Reading

  1. marriage.com – 12 Reasons Why Happily Married Men Cheat
  2. insider.com – 10 of the most common reasons someone might cheat
  3. hernorm.com – Why Do Cheating Husbands Stay Married?
  4. oneluckycouple.com – 5 reasons why cheating husbands stay married
  5. wikihow.com – How to Deal With a Cheating Spouse
  6. streetdirectory.com – 5 Things You Shouldnt Do If Hes Cheating on You
  7. bonobology.com – How To Deal With A Cheating Husband – 15 Tips
  8. beliefnet.com – 6 Things to Do Immediately After Finding Out Your Spouse is Cheating

About the Author

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Christie David-Simire

Christie is a dynamic individual with a natural interest in reading and writing. She is a Content Writer at ilifeguides.com, writing articles about relationships, parenting, finances, food, and gardening. Christie knows Human Resources Management and loves singing.

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