How Does A Narcissist React When You Stop Chasing Them

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By Oluwaseun Bamisile


Wondering how a narcissist will react when you stop chasing them? This article offers valuable insights into this dynamic.

We will start this article by discussing who a narcissist truly is. Then, we will discuss several reactions to expect when you stop pursuing such an individual.

Meanwhile, the third section provides tips and strategies for dealing with narcissists.

Finally, our FAQ section addresses common questions people often ask related to this article’s topic.

Who Is A Narcissist

How Does A Narcissist React When You Stop Chasing Them

A narcissist is someone who has an excessive obsession with themselves, their own needs, desires, and appearance. Narcissistic behavior is characterized by a lack of empathy for others and an inflated sense of self-importance.

Additionally, it involves a constant need for attention and a tendency to manipulate others for personal gain. According to, the term “narcissism” was gotten from the name of a Greek mythological character called Narcissus.

The character is the son of a god who fell in love with his reflection in the waters of a spring. Nevertheless, suggests that narcissism is a trait, and everyone may show occasional narcissistic behavior.

However, it can lead to a personality disorder known as narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). This is a clinical manifestation of narcissism, as said by Ramani Durvasula, Ph.D., a professor of psychology at California State University in Los Angeles

In fact, a report by states that NPD affects up to 6.2% of the population, with the majority being men.

How Does A Narcissist React When You Stop Pursuing Them

When you stop chasing a narcissist, their reaction can vary depending on the individual and the context of the relationship. Here are some common reactions that narcissists might exhibit when you stop pursuing them.

1. Attempts To Regain Control

If a narcissist senses that you’re pulling away, they might try to regain control and reestablish a sense of dominance. This behavior is often a response to their fear of abandonment and their need for constant validation.

Besides, according to, if they feel you’re valuable to their status, they will do anything to regain your attention. They could start by initiating contact and showing interest in your life.

As a matter of fact, suggest they will likely start love-bombing you. However, this is a manipulative technique that involves a sudden shower of overwhelming affection to regain control.

They could also use other manipulative tactics like guilt-tripping, blame-shifting, and hoovering to reel you back into their control.

2. Devaluation

Devaluation is a common reaction of narcissists when they sense that you are no longer chasing or giving them the desired attention. This behavior is a defense mechanism to protect their fragile ego, as hinted at by

Devaluation involves diminishing your worth or importance in their eyes, which can manifest in various ways. The narcissist might stop responding to your messages promptly, become distant, or even ignore you altogether.

They could also spread rumors about you, gaslight you, and provoke jealousy to make you feel insure and devalued.

3. Seek Out New Sources Of Validation

Narcissists have a constant need for admiration, attention, and validation from others. Furthermore, implies they often view relationships as transactional, seeking to extract as much validation as possible.

Hence, when they sense that you’re no longer providing them with their desired validation, they may seek it from alternative sources. This behavior is rooted in their insecurity and a constant craving for external affirmation.

Some narcissists may resort to attention-seeking behaviors, like provocative actions or controversial statements. Doing that could generate responses from others and thereby validate their importance.

4. Anger And Retaliation

According to, narcissists dislike being ignored. Hence, in some cases, particularly with more severe narcissists, they might react with anger, aggression, or even attempts at retaliation.

They might not handle rejection well and could lash out to protect their self-esteem. Anger can be a common reaction when narcissists feel they are losing control, as suggested by

They might lash out verbally or even physically in extreme cases. This can involve insults, name-calling, or even threats.

5. Move On

When you stop chasing a narcissist, they may react by moving on relatively quickly. This is often the case if they find a new source of attention, appearing unbothered by your withdrawal.

However, this could be a facade to mask their true feelings and intent to regain control, as suggested by Moreover, they might put up this facade of nonchalance to protect their ego.

To a narcissist, admitting that they are affected by your absence would be admitting vulnerability. Due to this, they prefer to project an image of being in control and unaffected.

How To Deal With A Narcissist

How Does A Narcissist React When You Stop Chasing Them

Dealing with narcissists can be challenging due to their manipulative behaviors, need for control, and lack of empathy. Nonetheless, here are some strategies to help you navigate interactions with a narcissist.

1. Recognize Manipulation Tactics

Narcissists are skilled at using manipulation tactics to control and influence those around them. Hence, when dealing with a narcissist, educate yourself about their common manipulation tactics, such as gaslighting, projection, and blame-shifting.

This awareness can help you spot the behaviors and not fall for them. Moreover, by enlightening yourself with these manipulation tactics, you can better understand the dynamics of your interactions with a narcissist.

This lets you step back, evaluate situations objectively, and protect yourself from being trapped in their manipulative web. It also helps to protect your mental and emotional health.

2. Set And Maintain Boundaries

As stated by, when dealing with a narcissist, setting firm boundaries is vital. Boundaries are the limits you establish to protect your physical, emotional, and psychological well-being.

They let others know what you find acceptable or not. However, narcissists often lack empathy and may not respect your boundaries naturally, as hinted at by

As a result, it’s crucial to be assertive and consistent in enforcing your boundaries.

3. Stay Calm And Rational

Narcissists often thrive on emotional reactions. Hence, you should learn to stay composed and rational during your interactions with such individuals.

You should also avoid getting drawn into their drama or attempts to provoke you. says meditation and deep breathing could make it easier to stay calm when interacting with a narcissist.

4. Limit Contact

Limiting contact involves reducing the frequency and intensity of interactions with a narcissist. You can choose to interact only when necessary and keep communication brief, as implied by

This strategy aims to minimize the opportunities for manipulation and emotional distress. It also helps deal with the conflicts that often arise when dealing with narcissistic individuals.

It’s a proactive step toward regaining control of your life and emotional health.

5. Consider Professional Help

Dealing with narcissists can be emotionally challenging due to their manipulative nature. Thus, consider seeking professional help if your interactions with such a person become overwhelming.

Professionals, such as a therapist or counselors, can provide you with valuable guidance, support, and coping strategies. They are experienced in dealing with complex interpersonal dynamics.

It is important to know that seeking professional help is not a sign of weakness. Instead, it’s a proactive step toward caring for your mental and emotional well-being.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. How Do You Make A Narcissist Fear You?

According to, you can make narcissists fear you by holding them accountable and setting boundaries. You can also make them fear you by refusing to engage in their toxic and manipulative behavior.

Doing that protects you from their negative influence.

2. How Does A Narcissist React When You Stop Chasing Them?

When you stop chasing a narcissist, they could react in various ways. For instance, they could attempt to regard control, devalue you, seek new sources of validation, and sometimes move on.

3. What Are The Benefits Of Ignoring A Narcissist?

Ignoring a narcissist can have several benefits, as it takes away their power of control and manipulation. Additionally, it empowers you and protects your emotional well-being.

4. What Are The Weaknesses Of A Narcissist?

Some of the weaknesses of a narcissist include fear of abandonment, low self-esteem, and difficulty handling criticism.

5. What Is The Full Meaning Of NPD?

The full form of NPD is Narcissistic Personality Disorder.


Understanding how narcissists react when you stop chasing them provides valuable insights into their complex behaviors. When you cease providing the attention they crave, they respond with distinct behaviors driven by their need for control.

This reaction often follows a predictable pattern that reflects their underlying insecurities. Gladly, this article discussed several ways such individuals react when you cease pursuing them.

I also provided tips for dealing with narcissists to protect yourself from their manipulation. Ultimately, in the face of the challenges posed by a narcissist’s reactions, remember that your well-being and emotional health are essential.

We sincerely trust that the information presented in this article has proven beneficial to you. Should you have found value in it, we kindly request your assistance in spreading the article through your social media platforms.

For more articles with similar topics, feel free to explore our Relationships page.

References And Further Reading

  1. – How Does A Narcissist React When You Stop Chasing Them?
  2. – How Does a Narcissist React When you Stop Chasing Them
  3. – How Does a Narcissist React When You Stop Chasing Them?
  4. – How does a Narcissist React when you Stop Chasing them? (Do they want you to Chase them?)
  5. – Does A Narcissist Want You To Chase Them: Unveil The Truth
  6. – 15 Things That Happen When You Ignore A Narcissist
  8. – 9 Tips for Dealing with Someone’s Narcissistic Personality Traits
  9. – 14 Tips for How to Deal With a Narcissist
  10. – How to Deal With a Narcissist
  11. – How to deal with a narcissist
  12. – How to Deal with a Narcissist
  13. – Narcissism: Symptoms and Signs
  14. – Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD)
  15. – Narcissistic Personality Disorder in Clinical Health Psychology Practice: Case Studies of Comorbid Psychological Distress and Life-Limiting Illness
  16. – What Is Narcissism? Symptoms, Causes, Diagnosis, Treatment, and Prevention
  17. – Narcissistic Rage: Triggers, Causes, & How to Respond

About the Author

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Oluwaseun Bamisile

Oluwaseun is the Lead Content Editor at He holds a National Diploma in Computer Science (currently studying part-time for his Higher National Diploma). An internet geek with a love for automobiles, he writes relationship articles, travel guides, and general life hacks on the site.

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